shattering the glass (penis) ceiling

So all this magnum talk gives me interesting research ideas. Last night, insanely bored and dreading the impending beginning of school today, I was doing some of that research. Magnum XLs are supposedly the widest condoms on the market, 30% bigger than regular condoms (standard magnums are 15% bigger). I happened upon Condomania.com, which boasts a line of 55 custom-fit condoms. What size are you? Download the measuring kit here, and let me know.

Actually, to fully understand the rest of this post, you might want to download it for reference. Plus, it is a rather hilarious thing to look at.

So this morning Tim and I are chatting, and I told him about what I found. He doesn't have a printer that works, but I do, so I print it out. We try to guestimate what he might be. I guess I should admit that I am working with only details he gave me, not firsthand experience in the lab or anything. But I first guessed D66; Tim definitely thinks the thickness is off (he's visual, I'm not). Then I cut the measuring tools out and realized I am way off. I didn't have a ruler, but using a sheet of paper as a guide, we think he could be a whopping G22, which is the largest size!

Tim's actual size is yet to be determined. I've got a fresh measuring kit waiting for him.

I've taped the measuring tools together to make a paper sculpture, which will hang on--you guessed it--the mobile.